SHITFEST 2014: SUMMER ~ NEED FOR SPEED (2014)

I recently reviewed the movie Need for Speed for Eric’s Shitfest. Take a look at my review and let’s see who can win the contest that Eric and I have challenged you all to do!
Thanks to Eric for sponsoring Shitfest summer!

 

Most people who know me, know that I kinda, sorta like movies. 🙂

I can usually find some (even minor) redeeming factor in most movies, but while searching for a movie to review for Summer Shitfest I was totally stumped as to what to review because it’s very hard for me to rewatch a movie that I thought was so horrendous that I would deem it Shitfest worthy.

After racking my brain for weeks, I finally decided on a title (turns out that Eric actually loved it) but I kept pushing off watching it because again I WANT to enjoy watching a movie, not to sit thru torturous agony for 2 hours.

Well, the other day, all, those plans were just completely thrown out the window (or flushed down the toilet as the case may be) because I watched another movie that I had anticipated for months and was in complete agony for 2-plus hours.

So my choice for Summer Shitfest is Need for Speed (2014)

The movie was appropriately named because I think in order to fully enjoy this movie, you most definitely need to be on fuckin speed.  (Good thing Aaron Paul is in it, maybe he can give you some Meth.)

There was no plot and the dialogue was pure shit.

You’d think that with 7 movies in the Fast and Furious Franchise and the plethora of street or highway racing movies over the last 50 years, they would have at least tried to make a movie that made some sense in order to compete.

Apparently, they just wanted to make money, so the best way to do that is to make a fun trailer, gets the asses in the seats and then cha-ching, you make lots of money, and it doesn’t matter how fucking stupid the movie is because the viewers have already paid their 10 bucks and there are no refunds at the cinemaplex.

I think this fan trailer for this movie is much better than the movie itself (and it was made by kids)

http://www.topparodies.com/parody/need-for-speed-movie-trailer-4-kids-parody-dub/33157

The acting was completely stale and I really just wanted everyone to die in a spectacular massive car crash.  (that would have made this watchable)

I kept looking at the clock and felt like crying because this movie was soooo long, 2 hours and 10 minutes is waaaaaay too long for a stupid road race movie with no plot, they should have cut out half the scenes and given us a shorter tighter shitty movie.

I decided that the best way to do this review would be to give you all a quiz to see who knows their off road racing movies.

So without further ado, here are 10 pictures from 10 road racing movies that are most definitely better than this turkey.

For this contest, whoever is able to guess what movies these pics are from, will be able to force Eric and I to each review 10 movies (5 for each of us) of your choice over the next few months. Send your guesses to either Eric {ei@theipc.me} or to me need4speed@movierob.net

If no one guesses all of them, whoever has the most correct guesses will be declared the winner.

Please don’t post your guesses in the comments (you’ll be helping someone else instead of yourself) 🙂 only send them by email.

Good luck to you all!!!

Rob (and Eric)

 

Let’s see how you all do!!!!!